Database Login Providing Support & Education To Those Who Grieve

Resources For Grief Blog

Welcome to this online journal for caregivers to the dying or bereaved—important and challenging work, for sure! My goal is to support you by providing inspirational thoughts, pertinent resources, and suggestions for self-care. With appreciation for all you do!

- Rebecca Hauder

(Be sure to sign up here to receive a monthly self-care tip by email. We don't sell or give our email list to anyone and you can unsubscribe at anytime.)

Don't Be So Hard On Yourself!

Don't Be So Hard On Yourself!

June 10, 2022

People are like stained-glass windows.

They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in,

their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within. 

~Elizabeth Kubler-Ross


The cliché, “Don’t be so hard on yourself,” is irritating because of its overuse, but nonetheless, I think it’s a good piece of advice. A recent NYT article* makes the claim that most of us view our own actions much more harshly than we do the actions of others, causing us to feel worthless, hopeless, and unimportant, as well as limiting our productivity! Caregivers tend to be especially hard on themselves—their work often relentless, thankless, and tough to get “right” for the persons in their care.


The author of the article offers a 3-step approach to practicing self-compassion, the antidote to self-criticism. Try practicing one or all of these tips the next time a bout of self-doubt hits.

1.   Interrupt the spiral of negative thinking by doing something you care about or enjoy, like calling a friend.

2.   Replace your negative thoughts with positive ones, such as “You’re doing your best,” or “We all make mistakes.”

3.   Practice treating yourself as you might treat a friend.


Warm regards,


Rebecca Hauder BSN, M.Ed.

Share This Post:

<< Back to Blog Articles