“The hardest thing in life is to know which bridge to cross and which to burn.” ~David Russell
My husband and I take regular walks. One of our routes involves a creek crossing over a precarious bridge (see photo above). Inevitably I hesitate, fret, pause, and complain before crossing. More sure of his balance, my husband crosses, and then encourages me to do the same, often coming back to offer assistance.
This rickety, forked bridge serves as a good metaphor for negotiating challenging relationships, especially when caring for others. Caregiving is rewarding, but it isn’t always easy! Even when giving our best, we sometimes fall short of the other person’s expectations. You know you’ve missed the mark because you hear grumbling or complaining, or maybe even yelling.
When the going gets rough, try stepping back emotionally in order to weigh your various options. Consider if it is safe to gently confront the other or engage in a difficult conversation. Or, you might decide it’s best to “turn around” and temporarily walk away until the emotional intensity has lowered, an option I often forget!
Warm regards, Rebecca S. Hauder, RN, LCPC
